Just in the nick of time -- Fresno Unified School District pulled the soft drinks out of campus vending machines. Ad Age magazine says this week Pepsi's going on a $55 million spending binge to roll out Diet Max, a cross between a no-calorie diet cola and an energy drink. The ad campaign will say, "Wake up, people!"
The drink reportedly contains ginseng and 46 milligrams of caffeine per eight ounces, double that of regular Diet Pepsi but a third the stimulant level in coffee or energy drinks. Can you imagine trying to ride herd on all those wired-up kids?
The Pepsi folks are marketing it to men -- they say it will take the yawn out of that 2 p.m. slump at the office. Most of the editorial writers go for diet drinks, so if we suddenly have days with 10 editorials -- all about baseball -- you'll know we're overdoing it here.
Let me see if I have this straight: Schools no longer permit choices for clothing including some sports-ware, nor for something as simple as an aspirin, trans fat, creationism, prayer, reading the Bible, or the celebration of certain un-politically correct holidays. However, they are allowed to choose abortion, but not life. Why shouldn't the fat-headed bureaucrats also refuse them the choice of soft drinks? Tolerance, anybody?
Nope, you didn't get it straight.
Some schools restrict clothing choices, but that is up to the individual school boards to decide.
Aspirin is banned as a result of those "zero tolerance" codes that you conservatives love so much.
Creationism is not taught in most schools because it is religion, not science, and is more properly taught at home or at church.
Officially-sanctioned prayers are banned because they violate the First Amendment Establishment Clause. But anyone can pray at school privately.
Bible reading is banned as a devotional activity for the same reasons, but anyone can read a Bible at school on their own time.
You don't specify which holidays schools don't observe, but they all close at Christmas time and for a week around Easter.
No one has abortions at school, as far as I know. But some do get pregnant and have babies while they're in school.
But soft drinks are indeed probibited at most schools in California now. Sorry if that bothers you so much.