Last week, when Mike Oz asked us which TV shows we thought would get the ax, I sent him a reply listing a dozen shows that SHOULD be taken off the air. His response: "Dude, pick one, you moron." (I added the "you moron" clause; I know he was thinkin' it, but he's just too nice -- well, most of the time.)
10.Big Bang Theory: Because it has lasted a season too long to begin with. And, despite being called the smartest show on TV, I feel dumber after watching it. Either dumber or annoyed. Yeah, both. And it has a laugh track.
9.Two and a Half Men: Because sometimes I just don't get America. And it has a laugh track.
8.CSI: Miami: Because it should have a laugh track.
I never paid attention to the game. It was hard with Vinny Testaverde always throwing the ball to the other team. So my dad gave me money to buy nacho chips at the concession stand.
When I asked why our team never tried to win in the fourth quarter, my dad said the Bucs were contractually obligated to lose. Which is why we always left early to beat the traffic out of Tampa Stadium.
I never cared that my brother played more innings on our little league team. I got to be the first-base coach, and root him on. I saw it as an opportunity to be like my dad, who was our team's head coach.
When I was asked who would win the 1987 World Series, I said the Twins. My dad wanted to know in how many games. I said seven. I didn't know what I was talking about. But I liked talking to my dad.
I was right, by the way. The Twins won that year -- in seven games.
My dad was right, too. He taught me to always root for the home team.
Are Obama supporters revolutionaries? Or just musical geeks?
I'm posting this because I'm a musical geek. [Thanks, Stephen.]
So, to be fair, if McCain's people have done anything half as geeky and/or related to "Les Miserables," lemme know and I will be ecstatic to post that, too.
Talk Like a Pirate Day, which falls on Sept. 19, has a special meaning for me. One, because I'm a Bucs fan; and two, because it's the date I chose to propose to my wife (no, I didn't say, "Arghh ya gonna marry me? -- but it would admittedly have been a much cooler story if I had).
Anyway, here are some tips on how to talk like a pirate today:
And, to get you in the mood, a "Yo Ho" sing-along:
So the Fresno State Bulldogs football team will be led on the field by its mascot, TimeOut, on Saturday, and fans will learn whether the new or old version won in the offseason poll conducted by the university.
Well, maybe the new one wouldn't have gotten so much flak if he took some cues from the Fresno Grizzlies baseball team's mascot, Parker. I came across this 2008 highlight package released on YouTube earlier this week, and it brought a smile to my face.
I have two hopes in life: That the cult following of "The Big Lebowski" grows to be half as big as "Rocky Horror," and that Fresno one day gets awarded the West Coast fest site.
Click below for lots of photos (featuring some great costumes):
Well, the original Dude, on whom the Coen brothers based Jeff Bridges' role. His name is Jeff Dowd. And Jeff Dowd mauled me during the screening of the film. (And I loved every second of it.)
This is my first fan fest of any kind, and I gotta say -- now I know why people go to these things. It's all about the excitement. If you can find something that you're passionate about, how cool is it when you find out there are other geeks like you?
So they do this every year in Kentucky, and then the past couple of years they've had a West Coast fest. The movie's been out for 10 years now, and the cult following is bigger than ever.
The best part: the 10th anniversary DVD comes out Tuesday, and they're giving away copies as prizes (fingers crossed -- not that I need another copy).
Second best part: Jeff Dowd, the real-life inspiration for The Dude, will be there. (Jeff Bridges attended the first Los Angeles one and even performed songs from the film.)
With the sixth overall pick in Mike Oz's blogger league, the Willys select:
ROUND 1: Randy Moss (WR, Patriots)
-- OK, I'm over the Patriots cheating their way to a perfect regular season, and I'm tired of losing at fantasy football. My plan with the first pick was to either take one of the very top RBs (LT, AP -- both gone), one of the very top WRs (Moss, T.O.) or Tom Brady/Peyton Manning. It was between Moss and Brady, and I figured I could get my QB later.
*** 8/23 UPDATE: Barack Obama officially named Joe Biden as his No. 2 on Saturday, thus officially ending the real dream ticket of Obama/Madonna, aka "Obamadonna." ***
8/19: Rumor has it Barack Obama will pick his running mate as soon as WednesdayThursdayFridaygrrrr Saturday morning, and John McCain will tap his veep next Friday (the day after ObamaCon).
Well, we here at The Beehive wanna let the candidates know it's not too late to think outside the box (and I'm not talking about Obama/Hagel or McCain/Lieberman).
Here are our recommendations for the next vice president of the United States ...
I like it when local artists do self-marketing -- it makes my job a lot easier. Marcel Nunis is pretty good at it. Here is his latest video for his one act "Tale End":
First produced at Rogue 2007, "Tale End" has a new cast and it's being produced by Theatre Ventoux, the outfit of former cast member Greg Taber. This is the second performance in two weeks at Full Circle Brewering for the show, which is headed to to the Bay Area for the San Francisco Fringe Festival the first week of September.
My weekend in San Francisco ... with Michael Phelps
This is not really Michael Phelps. But it was a good weekend to kinda look like the guy, as was evident by the more than a few women (and men) who made reference to the resemblance.
No, this guy is named Crazy Jay, and he lives in San Francisco. I don't know the dude, but he went to college with my buddy Rich, whom I haven't seen since my wedding (Summer 2006). So when Rich, who lives in Cleveland, took a few vacation days to see San Francisco, I got an offer to crash with Jay, who apparently lives in a cooler city than me. (Those are Rich's words.)
Haven't caught too much of the coverage since Friday's artistic masterpiece that was the unbelievable opening ceremonies. But I heard that Michael Phelps was gonna be swimming two gold-medal events -- LIVE from Beijing! -- during NBC's primetime coverage Tuesday night. In fact, throughout the multi-hour block of Olympic programming, there was an NBC logo (with the little Olympic rings and the peacock) that said "Live" to the left of it.
Well, I got news for NBC -- it wasn't live when I watched it.
This is what searching "fresno" on YouTube gets you ...
I have no idea who this guy is. If anyone knows him (his YouTube account name is "ChesterDickasen"), please give him my email (walbritton@fresnobee.com). I totally wanna hang with him.
Here is this dude at a local skate park:
But wait ... there's more. Really. I don't recommend investing the full-time allotment to these videos. But while he could use an editor, I like his style -- and, he is as good a local example that I've found of why YouTube was really invented.
Seriously, between the lemonade soda, chocolate chip cookies and Swedish Fish gummies (for the record, I wasn't a working journalist today because I participated as a filmmaker), I had a sugar rush before any of the films began.
Fresno film commissioner Ray Arthur was there, and this is his take (via MindHub):
Roque Rodriguez created something than could put Fresno on the "film" map. Roque's SWEDE Festival -- a cute little, snarky, kind of counter culture event ... I hope Roque runs with this for next year's Second Annual Fresno International Film Festival. It has the potential of being great fun for local filmmakers and moviegoers alike, and great for Fresno.
Here is Bryan Harley's submission (his Hi-larious take on the 1980s classic "RoboCop"):
In its honor, The Beehive has compiled a list of things we like with 8 in it, such as ...
The 8-bit Nintendo
Mike Oz says: My favorite 8 is the glorious 8-bit Nintendo. Sure, it doesn't have all the technological whoopty do of the Xbox 360 or Playstation 3, but there's never been a more fun gaming system. To me, 8/8/8 is a good chance to plug in the ol' 8-bit and save the princess again, knock out Mike Tyson, see if my fingers still have the Contra code memorized or rev up some Excitebike.
As we've bloggedbefore, the Fresno Swede Festival is happening Saturday at Corridor 2122. There are five (possibly six) official entries, with another one or two on the docket for showing. You can read more about the event, as well as all you ever wanted to know about sweding, over on Fresno Famous.
Without ruining Christmas for those involved who want to keep some surprises for the festival, here's a sneak preview (found on YouTube) of what to expect if you show up ...
"Iron Man" (produced by Brittany Stapleton, Katie Howden and Michael Banti):
"When Harry Met Sally" (this is the one I did with Josh Tehee and Jaime Holt ... and for those who can't guess which scene, I should probably mention that the audio is slightly NSFW):
UPDATE 8/5: They were in San Francisco on Tuesday. (photos)
ANOTHER UPDATE: ABC 30's video shows me looking like a perv. (more on this at bottom of post)
Here's my video report:
8/4: On Monday, at the southeast corner of Shaw and Blackstone Avenues in Fresno, there was a PETA protest. The main argument was an environmental one: that forgoing meat saves water.
In the video above you can see that public "nudity" always seems to attract interesting people.
The watchdog group Consumers Union, publisher of Consumer Reports, says the FCC should test elsewhere.
"The most highly impacted parts of the country happen to be in the Midwest and more rural areas," says Joel Kelsey, a policy analyst for Consumers Union. He says that's where there's a high concentration of analog viewers.
Kelsey applauds Wilmington for volunteering to go first, but says the FCC should focus on Minneapolis, Dallas, Houston, Salt Lake City and Fresno. He says more than 20 percent of those cities' residents will need to buy a converter box, a new TV or switch to satellite or cable to get a picture after the nationwide switch in February.
We've mentioned swedes (not the Kingsburg kind) before, but now that a deadline for the festival is approaching, it won't hurt to get the word out -- especially since there is a new deadline.
Here's what went out on MindHub earlier this week:
For all of you 'hubbers working on your Swede films, we have some great news! Fresno's First Swede Festival, to be held at Corridor 2122, has a new deadline of Monday, August 4th, to submit your fine works. This will give you another weekend to add the finishing touches. Email your work via YouTube to info@corridor2122.com by August 4, 2008. Finished films should be between 3-5 minutes.
The top films will be shown during Raines' August SPLASH Show on Saturday, August 9th, at 2:00 pm at Corridor 2122.
So it's not too late to get started. Heck, Josh and I haven't even picked a film yet. (Suggestions, anyone?)
While I think of one, here are the swedes of some of my favorite movies:
Bloggeraderie, Vol. 1: Joy of Joy Unconfined and Fresnocentric
Joy is a belly dancer in Fresno and a singer in the group Suicide Lounge. I met her at the Rogue Festival. She's quite the blogger, with a presence on two sites (her own, and the one she helped found with a group of fellow "Fresno chicks"). Since she couldn't join us for our Blogger Olympics back in May, we decided she'd be a great first entry in our new series, Bloggeraderie, which aims to promote the act of blogging in Fresno.
We hope to make this a regular feature on The Beehive, so if you know of any good local blogs (or if you'd like to stalk a local blogger), let me know. And I promise this won't be as long as whenI interviewedEricField.
The following are questions we emailed Joy over the weekend, as well as her answers:
Who is Joy Unconfined?
Joy Unconfined is me; just some chick.
Too simplistic an answer? There's a quote from Lord Byron that reads "On with the dance! Let joy be unconfined."
It struck a chord. Growing up with the name Joy was not easy for me. I've always been introspective. I was never outgoing and carefree and, well, joyful as people often expected. I was always shy and too worried about how I would be perceived; what the people around me wanted. Then I became an adult and at some point I realized that, while it is important to be aware of how you affect the people around you, it is just as important to be aware of who you are and what you want in life. So I adopted that Lord Byron quote as my new personal mission statement. I would be unconfined from the worry of "what the neighbors would think". I would follow my heart, and my head, and no longer be constrained by convention. That's how I became Joy Unconfined.
Actress Keira Knightley made news this week when Britain's Daily Mail reported that she wouldn't allow publicity photos to digitally enhance her breasts for her new movie "The Duchess."
Apparently, the crack marketing team behind 2004's "King Arthur" thought it would be a good idea to use sex to sell its violent telling of Camelot. After being given a C cup, Knightley said she didn't give a "[expletive deleted]" at the time.
But now she's putting her foot down. And I say good.
While I've always been a fan of hers, I've never been under the delusion that she has large breasts. And I can't imagine the target audience for "The Duchess" hasn't noticed the same thing in Keira's previous films.
But just in case you haven't seen her before (or even if you have), let's take a look at a brief photographic history of her resume, shall we:
*** UPDATE: Cuil seems to have found Fresno now. Must have been a first-day glitch. Any Beehive readers out there wanna give their review about this thing? ***
Yes. The Fresno Bee's very own news copy editor extraordinaire and NPR fanatic Emily Kuchar (she begins her daily shift to "All Things Considered" on her iPod) was the opening-segment contestant on Saturday's episode of the news game show "Wait Wait Don't Tell Me."
Highlights include one of the panelists flexing knowledge of our fair city, as well as the apparently very funny Emily calling a certain presidential candidate "gorgeous."
LISTEN TO HER SEGMENT: The segment is called "Who's Carl This Time?" (And, spoiler alert, she did win the ultimate prize of Carl Kasell's voice on her voicemail.)
Over on The Beehive's sister blog for the sports fans in the Valley, the wait is over. Check out the new Sports Buzz to see the new look -- just in time for football season.
Mulder and Scully ... take on a mundane abduction case with the help of a psychic (Billy Connolly) ... that's not enough to make the story worthy of an "X-Files" case.
The attempt to provide for many instead of the few loyal fans is the film's undoing.
The case ends up being nothing more than something done better on "CSI."
Here's his one-minute version (edited by Tom Brisson):
Uploaded yesterday on YouTube, location: the ever-classy Club One Casino in downtown Fresno (had lunch there last Friday, so I'm not a hater):
It took me 14 seconds to figure out what song they were singing. (How bout you?)
I love karaoke. I like that it's an opportunity for non-singers to shine. But if you can't sing it, then you gotta bring it.
And I know there are a bunch of places in town that offer this affordable and entertaining activity. My favorite is Sierra Lanes (where I've sung "Cold Day in July" by the Dixie Chicks and "Tomorrow" from "Annie"). Both times I've seen a very talented older gentlemen serenade his wife (of what would have to be 50 years) with classic Dean Martin-type tunes.
UPDATE 8/2: I got the bug after posting this, so I went to Tokyo Garden and did "Memory" from "Cats" ... my wife hates "Cats," but she says it's still better than the time I did "I Don't Know How to Love Him" from "Jesus Christ Superstar"):
Tell me why I should. I gotta say, I am interested after seeing this trailer:
Oh, hi, Will here. Big musical fan confessing to not seeing "Mamma Mia." It debuted on the West End in 1999 during the semester I was studying in London. I saw countless shows that spring (was studying theater, btw), but I neglected to see the big new show "Mamma Mia" because I didn't care to see a musical based around previously recorded pop songs.
A couple of weeks ago, Heather asked us Beehivers what we were obsessed with. At the time, I had nothing. But tonight I stumbled upon "Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog," a three-part Internet series (13 minutes apiece) starring Doogie as an evildoer who blogs -- and sings.
My favorite part is it's a musical. But it's also very funny -- much in the same way the puppet Dracula musical bit in "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" was very funny.
The bad news: it's only up for free till midnight Sunday. So go, watch it, do it. Do it now.
We know there were midnight, and 3 a.m., and 6 a.m. showings of the latest "Batman" movie. I had to, you know, be functional today, so I didn't attend. If you did, we'd love to hear from you.
In the meantime, you can check out Bee film critic Rick Bentley's print review here.
Or just sit back, and watch his one-minute (technically clocking in at 1:33) version:
Why can't Rays fans and Red Sox fans get along?
