What as a society did we do to deserve such punishment? Sure we waste fuel. We are often so absorbed in a meaningless cell phone conversation we forget the rest of the world. Don’t get me started on the people at the checkout stand who spend 10 minutes finding that dollar they hid in their wallet just so they can pay their bill.

Those are all terrible things. But those things aren’t really bad enough to deserve the plague that is going to rain down on us starting Sunday. Bring in the farm animals. Store extra food and water in a safe place. Get your affairs in order. “Big Brother” is coming back.

AAARGGHHHHH!!!!!

Reality television’s answer to catching darts with your eyeballs is returning for another season. This time 13 strangers will be sealed in the house set on the Studio City lot to see who can be the last houseguest standing. The prize is $500,000 and, if we are lucky, instant anonymity.

The houseguests, under the evil eye of the nauseating Julie Chin, will spend their time in the house eating, smoking, cursing and dealing with stupid challenges. The only break they get is when they all stop to take a moment and stab each other in the back.

The promise is this “Big Brother” goes back to the show’s roots. Recent versions have included long lost relatives, couples and even a monkey. OK. There was no monkey. It couldn’t have hurt. This version will just be good old fashioned battles spawned by greed.

Why doesn’t this show go away? Maybe it is too much to expect from a network that won’t pull the plug on “Swingtown.” Every CBS executive must have taken an extended vacation after the writers strike. The executive with the keys to the cancelation booth needs to get back to work.

“Big Brother” has no redeeming qualities. The nice people either get booted quickly or they are turned to the dark side. The only action comes when contestants have to answer dumb questions or complete some lame physical challenge. Here’s a thought. Really seal them in the house. Then we can watch as they try to escape.

It can’t be just the lurid chance someone will end up naked. If that was the case someone at CBS would have cast a nudist a long time ago. And it can’t be the hope a physical romance will bloom on camera. Just remember, there is a 75 year old contestant this time. You watch. He will be the first to get naked and have sex on camera. That will teach you.

If mercy still exists, this will be the last of “Big Brother.” Haven’t we suffered enough?