I love the Tony Awards every year. Sure, they're even more fun to watch when you've seen all the nominated shows, which happened to me exactly once in my life (the year I spent on an arts fellowship in New York) and will likely never experience again. But even when I haven't seen any of the honored titles, I love the Tonys for all of its award-show excesss: the heartfelt speeches, the glittery gowns, the boffo production numbers. (Boo-hiss to the Oscars for drumming the musical dance numbers out of existence because of their perceived dork factor; I, for one, liked a little song-and-dance distraction. And besides, what do we get now at the Oscars in lieu of the musical interludes? More boring montages and even more commercials.) At the Tonys, however, the musical numbers are the whole REASON for the show. This is theater, after all, and if you have an issue with people breaking into song and shimmying around the stage, you're at the wrong place, bud.

So. This year I can safely say that I have NOT seen all the nominated shows, but that isn't going to diminish my enjoyment of this year's telecast (hosted by Whoopi Goldberg) one little bit. And this year, I can say that since I did make a trip to New York in the spring, I got to see a couple of the titles up for awards this year, including "Passing Strange" and the revival of "Sunday in the Park with George." (Sorry, "Gypsy" and "South Pacific" hadn't opened yet.) So out of loyalty, consider me a "Passing Strange" man.

OK, the show is "starting" (8 pm on CBS) in just a few minutes. REMEMBER: Don't go to other news sites online if you want to be surprised at the winners. The Associated Press has a nasty habit of ruining the West Coast feed of awards shows by blabbing the results on the wire.

8 pm: Is that Whoopi Goldberg in a cheetah costume? There's a full-fledged tribute to "Lion King" under way, and I'm a little confused: Aren't the Tony Awards supposed to honor NEW Broadway shows? Does "Lion King" really need the extra plug? Probably not. But on its 10th year anniversary, I guess it deserves some props. Turns out that Whoopi shows up late for the production number (she's dressed as a crab from "The Little Mermaid.") Um, as openings for awards shows go, not too promising, but I'm already looking forward to the appearance of the original cast of "Rent."

8:08 pm: First award is best featured actress in a play: Rondi Reed gets the prize for "August: Osage County," one of the heavy favorites this year.

8:10: pm: John Waters introduces the musical number for "'Cry-Baby" (based on his movie starring Johnny Depp) and gets off what has to be one of the best bizarre lines of the evening: "One wonders if there are actual prisoners watching the Tony show tonight?"

8:15 pm: Lots of prisoner-dancers in extremely tight pants are writhing on stage. The "Cry-Baby" number is frantic and features a lot of strenuous dancing -- but the song isn't exactly making me run to iTunes to buy the original cast recording.

8:23 pm: Laura Linney announces the award for best featured actor in a play: to Jim Norton, "The Seafarer." It's his first Tony.

8:26 pm: The number from "Passing Strange." I have to tell you, this is an amazing musical. It tells the story of a young middle-class black man who embarks on a world journey that takes him to such exotic locales as Amsterdam. After I saw it I wrote, "With a melodic rock score, the show is in the vein of "Hedwig and the Angry Inch" in terms of staging and musical intensity." Unfortunately, it's a hard show to describe and an even harder one to pull a show-stopping musical number from. It's one of those shows that has more of cumulative effect on an audience that one that can wow you with a 2-minute excerpt. What I remember most from seeing the show live is just how charismatic the cast (including Stew, the creator of the show) is.

8:36 pm: John Lithgow presents the award for best direction of a musical: Bartlett Sher wins for "South Pacfic." Everything I have read about this show mentions how ground-breaking, fresh and exciting it is. And everyone mentions how Kelli O'Hara reinvents the role of Nellie Forbush. Frankly, I'm surprised that a show with a number titled "I'm Going to Wash that Man Right Outta My Hair" has been given a contemporary sheen, but, hey, I'm impressed.

8:40 pm: Jack Klugman is on stage. (I am so happy to see him; somewhere I got it in my mind that he had left us. Don't you hate it when you do that?) He introduces the musical number from "Gypsy," which he starred in decades ago.

8:42 pm: Patti LuPone and Mama Rose in "Gypsy": Many folks have waited for that combination for years. In this musical scene for the Tony Awards, we get a chance to see her acting chops as well as that celebrated belt of hers with a version of "Everything's Coming Up Roses" that almost blows the roof off of Radio City Music Hall. I last saw LuPone (who's famed for such shows as "Evita") in "Sweeney Todd" on Broadway a couple of years ago, and then later in a performance at Los Angeles Opera production of "Rise and Fall of the city of Mahagonny," and I'm telling you: She's intense.

8:48 pm: Whoopi finally injects some laugh-out-loud levity into the evening with a fun spoof of "Phantom of the Opera." Let's put it this way: After that "Lion King" yawner, I was about ready to jump into the closest French sewer.

8:55 pm: Lin-Manuel Miranda picks up the award for best score for "In the Heights." He does the speech in rap-style: Nice touch, along with the Puerto Rican flag he waves at the end.

9:01 pm: "South Pacific" struts its stuff. We get just a glimmer of Kelli O'Hara singing "I'm in Love with a Wonderful Guy" -- but I'm telling you, in those brief moments I could see what everyone's talking about. She brings a sassy, enthusiastic sparkle to the role. (Still not sure if I'd want to hear "Bali Hai" one more time, but I guess that's the price you've gotta pay.

9:10 pm: Laura Benanti wins best featured actress in a musical for "Gypsy." Arthur Laurents, one of the greats, gives her a standing ovation. Sweet speech. At the end she thanks her mother, the "anti-Mama Rose."

9:14 pm: Wasn't "Grease" the show that cast its two leading stars (Danny and Sandy) via a reality TV series? From what we could see in the montage, I'm not sure that's the best approach for a Broadway show. The title song starts out weak, and Sandy sort of croaks her way onto stage. There's something bubblegum-boring about the montage: bland and shrink-wrapped. This grease is more like corn oil.

9:23 pm: Brooke Shields gives the award for best featured actor in a musical: Boyd Gaines for the revival of "Gypsy." Most Broadway pundits are guessing that "South Pacific" will win the overall prize for best musical revival, but "Gypsy" is coming on strong.

9:26 pm: The "also featured" performances (otherwise known as We Weren't Good Enough to Get Nominated But We Make Gobs of Money on Broadway consolation prize) are unveiled: "The Little Mermaid," "A Catered Affair" (which I'm thinking of picking up the cast recording for) and "Young Frankenstein" (which looks horrible, and notice that it really got shut out of Tony love, especially when compared to Mel Brooks' last show, "The Producers.") By the way: I've always been a big fan of Faith Prince, who performs in "A Catered Affair." She has a brassy belt and a warmth on stage that always makes me smile.

9:37 pm: Whoopi is back to introduce the nominees for best play. I like the way that set pieces from each nominated play glide into view as she announces each clip. Very classy. Earlier in the show, she had a fun routine as Mary Poppins as she floated onto stage dressed as a nanny. ("Sure," she says grudgingly, "I'll take care of the kids.") Sure, Whoopi is goofy, but at least she's enthusiastic. I feel like she's really selling these non-musical plays. She might even talk a few tourists who were hoping to see "Wicked" into going to "August: Osage County" or "Boeing-Boeing."

9:44 pm: Best direction of a play: "August: Osage County." Big props to the Steppenwolf Theatre Company in Chicago. (They're the same folks that come to CSU Summer Arts at Fresno State.) You know something I always think about the Tony Awards: The speeches are a lot better than at the Oscars. Those theater people know how to do things live.

9:54 pm: Mary Louise-Parker (I love her love her love her, I'm on the third season of "Weeds") presents the award for best leading actor in a play: Mark Rylance for "Boeing-Boeing." (His acceptance speech, an amazing omelette of a non-sequitur, will likely be explained tomorrow in the New York Times.)

9:58 pm: Best leading actress in a play goes to Deanna Dunagan for "August: Osage County." What a strong, impassioned speech: her voice clear and resonant, her emotions controlled but still on display: absolutely charming. Aren't theater actors great?

10:05 pm: The musical number from the nominated "In the Heights." Great dancing. Not sure if this medley of songs really showcased the musical to best effect.

10:14 pm: This should come as no surprise: The award for best play goes to "August: Osage County."

10:20 pm: Mandy Patinkin (he of the very high voice and previous starring role in "Sunday in the Park with George") accepts the Lifetime Achievement Award for Stephen Sondheim. This is a nice segue into the musical offering from the revival of the show. Did I say earlier that I saw this when I was in New York, too? (We're up to the two and a half hour mark and I'm getting a little punchy.) It was glorious. On the Tony telecast, we get to see the amazing scenic design of the show: the way that the famous painting by Georges Seraut comes to life in a wonder of computer animation. The colors swirl and leap to life in a fantastic progression of images that form before our eyes. We get a taste of this on the Tonys. Absolutely beautiful. Add to that Daniel Evans and Jenna Russell singing Sondheim's "Move On," and it's a mesmerizing combination.

10:35 pm: "Xanadu" involves disco, roller skates, Greek goddesses, men's shorts the length of OP cord shorts (remember those) and lots of headbands. It looks hysterical.

10:45 pm: A tribute to "Rent," which is closing later this year. The original cast might be, um, a little older, but the feeling is still definitely there.

10:50 pm: Patti LuPone wins her second Tony award for "Gypsy." She cracks a joke about winning the Tony every 30 years or so. Then she cracks ANOTHER joke about the length of time between her awards. Maybe it's just getting late, but her speech is kind of annoying me. It goes on and on -- oh my god, it's pages and pages! She spits out an absurd quantity of names, right down to what must be the ticket takers at the St. James Theatre, and she's STILL going. "Shut up, it's been 29 years!" she screams at the orchestra. Yep, she sure is doing her Mama Rose routine. I love ya, Patti, but I wish Kelli O'Hara had won.

10:57 pm: I have to go to the bathroom. And my laptop battery is dying. Is this show ever going to end?

10:59 pm: And the award for best musical goes to "In the Heights." Last one. It's a wrap.

FINAL THOUGHTS: I'm going to download a couple of songs from "In the Heights" and see if I can work up some enthusiasm for the music. The medley performed tonight just didn't grab me all that much. I always try to eventually see the best musical from each year. Maybe this one comes across better on stage. Obviously, the Tony folks realized that the most important thing they can do is promote Broadway, which is why the three hours of televised awards didn't even include most of the technical ones (for lighting, scenic design, etc.). The reason? So they could fit in not only the expected numbers from the nominated musicals, but even snippets from shows that weren't even nominated. And then they had product placement for longer-running Broadway shows. Was there any musical out there that wasn't somehow squeezed onto the telecast? I think not. While the relentless promotion did seem excessive, it did make for a lot of music, which is audiences seem to like. I'd like to thank my fellow Beehiver Will for sticking with me through the entire 181 minutes of the show. I won't go so far as to say it was an enchanted evening, Will, but it was pretty fun.