and here i am on a friday night drinking a tall can wishing i was there, damn! the place looks tight though. the freaks are going to be in full force this weekend.

The hype surrounding the opening of the 2039 Ultra Lounge could not have been greater! It seemed as if every "Trendy Local" person knew about this spot opening up. I had plans to possibly attend but I thought about doing something else with my night other than seeing the same people doing the same thing AGAIN here in the "Valley".

My buddy Justa Just hit me with a text around three o'clock Friday afternoon and he said he and his girl were going to swing through this joint to check out the scene; that's all I needed to hear and I was "All In, ask BJ about my All In skillz on the poker table", no more questions needed to be asked except how to get there of course! I picked up my little brother, no not the group, around 7:30pm and we were off to meet up with Justa and the rest of the gang.

Not truly knowing what was going to take place at this venue, we left Justa's casa around 8:30pm or so. Note to self, I've been to a plethora of clubs, celeberty events, and concerts but I've never left for a spot so early! You see, the anticipation of something great was in the air, we were all thrown back into high school/college mode, it was time to party and listen to some live music at the same time.

We pulled up to the spot and before the bouncer could check my ID, I noticed that I already knew close to half the people inside the club and a couple standing outside the club too. Mind you, the last time I was out to an opening night was at Roe and now I laugh when I drive by that joint during the day.

The same old faces, from College Night seven years ago when I really used to go out, were there, I mean even some of the security and the head bouncer. The inside of th venue wasn't as "ULTRA" as I thought it would be either. I mean for as much hype as I heard about this place, it looked like they added some new paint, lights, and they blew out a back wall in order to add a little different flava...

Speaking of flava, why did Justa shell out close to ten dollars for a watered down beverage though! Anyway, there was no way Fresno was going to disappoint me again with another hyped up venue, which failed to produce the substance that I was looking for, fun.

As I stood around waiting for the first band of the evening to perform, 40 Watt Hype, I noticed former college classmates strolling in with their significant others, I noticed a lot of older people (which wasn't bad, just a little different), but I didn't see the excitement, the pizzaz, the over the top glitz which makes you want to text everyone you know and say, "Guess where I'm at mank"!

Hearing 40 Watt Hype for the first time was cool. Their sound was unique enough to where I didn't have to say, "Man, they sound like"... After "40" came the local hip-hop act Argyle Pimps. When you hear local, at least here in Fresno, and hip-hop you usually don't get any type of quality (real quality that is), sorry to all the local hip-hop groups who's form of music is on the "T-Pain" side of things!

The crowd seemed ready for the change of music anyway but there was only one problem, there was no music for close to thirty minutes, I understand, it happens, so we had to deal with it and actually talk to other people in the crowd (I mean that's what we were there for anyway right or at least one would think). Tommy "D" did his best to get everything moving sound wise and when it did...

LOL, when it did "The Pimps" were ready to go. Wait, I have a quick question, "Didn't Paul Pinnegar get repremanded for drinking or driving drunk while he was playing football at State"? Why the HELL was he drunk AGAIN (there's a shocker right) and yelling at the members of "The Pimps" telling them they suck? I know, I know, I know, two questions in a row... But don't fear there's an ending to this questioning! Paul, you're yet another Fresno State athelete who went from hero to goat in oh, I don't know, a two month period. This guy shouldn't tell anyone they suck after what he did to end his career at Fresno State. I would say he should go and get Lasik but he's only playing catch with... I don't know if they even allow his good eye around a football anymore! The worst part about his outburst is one of the members from the Argyle Pimps was excited to see Paul Pinnegar even at their show. The guy came up to me and we were talkin' about stuff and he was like, "Yo, that's Paul Pinnegar man, that guy did a lot for the Valley." Even when Pinnegar was yelling at the member, I could see the disappointment on "J's" face but all he told Pinnegar was man you did a lot for the Valley! I was blown away with Pinnegar's crass but then again, maybe I expected some ignorance but not from him at least, well then again, he is an athelete and a mediocre on at that now a days...

Anyway, I apologize for my words, they're only words. Sam Williams (Oakland Raiders, linebacker) was in attendance and he was chill, like Denzel said in American Gangster, "The loudest one is the weakest one." That probably flew over Paul's head just like one of his passes against every team following the USC game....

The Argyle Pimps were lively! They brought an energy which was seriously lacking at the time. Speaking of lacking, I stood around for close to three hours and I didn't have a real want to drink anything other than water. Man, I forgot what water even tasted like, much like I forgot what night life in Fresno was like. I listened to three songs from "The Pimps" and I told my party it was time to leave this "Ultra Lounge".

Disappointed, no, not really, I truly expected this to go down the way it did because it's Fresno and we just aren't quite there yet. Some people might read this and say man, this guy is a hater... Well, perhaps but then again, I've done it big in too many places to name on both coasts and with different stars (Mercury, Venus, and Mars are planets not stars) and I'm just used to more I guess. Like the beginning of Brown Skin Lady - Black Star (Talib Kweli and Mos Def) "I've been conditioned, even my conditioning has been conditioned."

I strolled in and out of the "Lounge" because I'm incognito and I stroll around this town of ours much the same. Everyone knows my face, they just don't know my faces!

Big Mike Oz, thanks for holding down the seats for me too, it was good to see you out and about... Tell Heather she looked good, I mean since her TCBY days down at Fresno State!

Maybe if we had pulled up the "Ultra Lounge" closer to 11pm everything would have seemed somewhat normal but being there from the beginning until when we left... Ah, everything seemed somewhat normal for Fresno night life!

...I'm looking at these shots, thinking... 'spacious,' (looking at the bird insignia?
thinking...
Polish Falcon? (nah, few people in these parts know what that is...
Reich Eagle? (ulp? but nah... nope, that'd be a downer...
-I've have just settled on: 'Euro-Bird...'
(I get it, Euro...Techno, chic,,, 'now is the time on sprockets, er, fresno where we dance..'
okay, cool...)

---whole time the voice of Mr. Rogers is in my head saying
'...can you say caramel, boys and girls?, sure, I like how you say caramel,,,whups, there goes my loafer...'

It looks cool... very cool.... best of luck...

Man, I wish I could be too-cool-for-school like "Incognito". Sounds like the coolest guy, like EVER. He can see that he knows half the people in the place before he even turns the corner. That IS cool. Coast to Coast cool.

Hopefully Fresno can one day match up to the Incongnitos of the world.

Mr. Fresnan, I concur that Incognito's post had that certain cooler-than-thou tone ... but I still welcome more posts from him, cuz that was pretty entertaining.

Plus, it would be nice to have someone around here who can reference Little Brother.

Incognito, that was a pretty impressive account of the evening. I could have done without the reference to my TCBY days, though. ;)

Mike, I agree there were some good nuggets in Incongnito's post. The whole section on Paul Suckagar acting like an ass during Pimp's set was awesome and I'm jealous I didn't catch it myself.

But when you're breakin' down your afternoon texting and how you've been to every badass place there is, I gotta call the dude out on that.

I read an article about the opening of the Ultra Lounge a few weeks back and saw a photo...looked liked a cool new spot to check out. From the article and single photo, I anticipated a classy downtown lounge that might provide a different crowd and quality music.
This anticipation was smothered when we ordered drinks and shots, and they were given to us in a plastic Heineken Cup that I would expect as a beer festival. The shot that came next was in a plastic punch cup that had a crack in it.
The lounge seemed way oversized for the crowd there, which resembled a North Fresno spot.
It would take a good music act to bring any of us back.
Dissapointed

I apologize but I really wasn't attempting to come off as an arogant guy; I was just stating that we need to jump out of the box and really make it happen around this town of ours! There's a thriving community out in the Tower District but people feel like it's too ghetto. I told someone earlier that I'd rather be downtown than uptown at this point because everyone is real...

I'm really not an arogant person...or for that matter the coolest guy ever, or even in my family. person tryin to do here."

I really give the club two to three months and then it will be another nightclub casualty.

Have any of you seen Jeff Dunham's Achmed piece? Do me a favor, YouTube that joint and look for the skeleton and listen to what he says about "Location"!

So Heather for bringing up the past; you looked great, time has defintely been on your side! Mike, I know you know a little somethin', somethin' about Little Brother man...

I think we just lost one with "So Am I" and we'll continue to lose a few more if nightclubs don't step up to the table and TRULY entertain... Hey, Fresnan and Oz, I got your next beverage at the next venue which opens up or maybe we can sit in front of an empty "Ultra Lounge" in a couple of months. Either way, I'll make sure you see the drinks but you'll never see me!

- Incognito

"like Denzel said in American Gangster, "The loudest one is the weakest one." "

Oh, the irony.

It would seem to me that any place that tries to make it as the next ultra hip whatever is doomed to failure as soon as it opens. Whats ultra hip is also ultra transitory and will fade as soon as trends change (every year give or take?). Bars/pubs that make it for the long haul don't try to be anything more than a comfortably familiar place to drink and eat...perhaps the best example being Livingstones. It's never the "hippest" place around, but I can't guess how many others have come and gone since I've been going there (1990). To its credit, it hasn't felt the need to change (have the mounted animals on the wall ever been dusted? In a way, I kinda hope not)...which is why I always find myself there when I make it out and about (but I still mourn for the good old days that was Goodbody's Pub...getting misty here thinking about it...).

all i can say.....is that it's not so Ultra at all.

I went there thinking that this is going to be the next hottest club in Fresno and by looking at the highly designed fliers...I was a bit excited. I loved the eagle logo and the layouts. From the photos, I was thinking that is gotta be a cool place to hang out, dance, and meet new people that wants to spend money and enjoy life.

But instead, when I got there...half the people there is not so friendly. The bar is okay but the quality is not there. If I am paying money for a shot of drink, i expect a nice shot glass with my liquor in it and not a plastic medicine cup. So instead, i was sipping on some mix drink...just babysitting it and waiting for the excitement to happen. But nothing came.

I been to ghetto clubs to upscale clubs and this club falls below some ghetto clubs.

Being in Fresno, i have dance to many Djs but none of them can move the crowd or just know how to mix. But there is one dj that is really cool in person and knows how to get the crowd going.

they need : DJ STYLEZ

yep....that is their solution.